Being in the darkness

I recently went on a night hike with my partner: it started out splendid and joyful, and turned into one of the most intense conversations we had ever had. A conversation that felt like the end of our relationship. Most of us are broken; we have some part of ourselves we constantly question the quality or even existence of, some part of us we hide under “I’m fine.” But we are not fine. There is a deep dark place we are all afraid to look at. A place we do not want to go. Several years ago, my fiance died suddenly. Here. Gone. Ever since that day I have felt like part of me is missing, there is a big black hole I tell myself is empty, but it truly filled with loss and abandonment and fear an

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© 2019 by Sasha Neese.